The End

So recently, or at least over the 24 months, I have taken up reading for pleasure. I am not sure why I stopped reading in the first place but I can certainly pinpoint it to October 2005. The month that all things changed. However, I have found the time to begin reading again; and it has become somewhat of an obsession.
I loved the Stephanie Meyer books, and that led to a love of Charlaine Harris. She is the author of the Sookie Stackhouse series and a number of other books, all with characters that I have come to love. I love Sookie so much; I named my kitten Sookie. I have read at least 20 of Mrs. Harris' books. She is a fantastic author, but my love of reading seeps into other authors as well.
Reading for pleasure is fun and I devour books in days rather than weeks. I have found that I am willing to give any book a fair read, but I have some weird habits that I will share with everyone, in the hopes that my habits are shared and not nearly as weird as I think they are.
1. I don't borrow books from the library. Why? I do not know. I worry that the two children in my house may destroy them. I worry that I may not read them fast enough in order to avoid fines. I also LOVE the smell of a new book. The way that the cover looks and how the pages feel are like drugs to me. Also the feeling of ownership that I feel. I love the feeling of ownership. I now own the story, the words, the characters. Weird huh? I know this is odd but very true. I read the books so fast, my habit can be rather expensive. Getting them from the library would alleviate this cost, other than the possibility that my kids could get ahold of it or I could return it late.... oh, it's useless. I really just like new books.
2. I will stay up to finish a book. I will ignore chores in order to read a book. I will read it so fast, as if the story may change or disappear if I don't read it right that minute. If I am reading a series, I will collect them in order to be sure that I have the next book the second that I finish the previous book. I am addicted.
3. I must read every book in a series, and in order. I will not read a book if I don't start at the beginning of the series. I also do not like it if I cannot finish a series, I want to know the character from start to finish. I ordered the new Sookie book 3 months before its release date. This was to ensure that I got to read it as soon as possible.
4. I HATE the end of the book. I start to get sad when I am in the last chapters. I want to read and read quickly, but sometimes I slow down during the last part of the book in order to make it last a few more minutes. I actually dislike finishing the book and especially dislike it when there isn't another book to read in the series. For example: I waited months to get my new Sookie book. I read it in two days. I can not believe that I read it so fast because it will most likely be months or even a year until there is a new one. This is all very frustrating. I mourn the end of the series; whenever that may be. But I know it will happen, so I am going to worry about it now. I know, I am a weirdo.
Call it an obsession, or an addiction, but at least its a reasonable one. I also think it may be genetic because my maternal grandmother and my mother are both avid readers. I am not sure if they share my weirdness, but I definitely share their love of books. I can honestly say that I have 500+ books in my home at the moment. I have 6 book shelves and two rubbermaid totes filled with books. Children's books, teen books, classics and Colin's science fiction and my mysteries. Books are awesome and the ability to write an interesting story from start to finish is a gift that I wish that I had. For now, I will simply share in the stories that authors chose to share!

Life, unmanaged.

My life is unmanaged at the moment. The first clue would be that I just posted this blog without having written a thing. This would be because I am trying to multi-task and pull up my daughter's jeans, drink a cup of coffee, read my newest "Sookie" book, outline my chapters for class, and blog at the same time. I find myself willing to add to that list, just to keep busy. I find myself questioning that logic, I have four full-time jobs as it is!! My life is busy, but I enjoy being busy and having a full schedule. I am starting to wonder why I add more and more to my list; because it feels like I do less and less well.
First and foremost my full time is the Kids. I work for Joey and Chloe enterprises! I love this job, although it is the most overwhelming job that I have. I wonder on a daily basis if I am doing a good enough job. You know, I really don't recall an interview process or a training period. I am not always sure that I would have made it to a third round interview, let alone a full time position as "parent." The kids are fantastic. Joe was reading a Little Critters book out loud yesterday and Chloe makes up her own songs. I can not really point out what I had to do with that other than encouraging them to be very independent. Colin works with Joe on the reading thing, but truly I don't believe I had anything to do with it. I am very proud of my children, I do all that I can for them. I stayed home for five years, and although many mothers say they would love to be able to do that; five years was enough for me! Not that I don't cherish those years at home with my babies, I gave them every little bit of myself. Going back to work gave me back part of myself.
My second full time job is my Hubby. We have been together for 14 years. But the real work began in 2001 when we got married. Marriages are work, and I have been seriously neglecting my work. On a daily basis I need to remember how lucky I am to have him in my life. He is a good husband in many respects. He loves me, he loves the children. He is devoted to taking care of us and making sure that all is well in our lives. He cooks, cleans, and goes the distance when I fall short. I am truly blessed. I really think I may need re-trained on the marriage thing, because I feel like I resist more than I comply. Marriage is all about give and take, I have been taking more than my fair share.
My third full time job is school. This I actually may be doing well enough at. So far I have all A's and a singular B. Which is a good thing, considering that I did not do very well in my other attempts to go to college. I am a marketing major. I enjoy the subject matter, but few others in my world enjoy it as much as I do! It's all right, I still enjoy it!! I don't spend the time on school that I should. I should be outlining my chapters as I write this, preparing for class tonight. As it stands, I'll get it done but at the last minute. This is my how I roll! I like being rushed I guess!
My fourth job is fantastic, but the least understood. I love my career-in-progress. Of course, not as much as my job as a parent!! But I work as a brand representative for a marketing company out of Akron. I really enjoy the position. It challenges me and it rewards me. I work hard, but it is a really fun job. I have a good boss who is more than willing to work with me and my home and school schedule. I believe in the brands that I am representing and it makes it really enjoyable to promote them. At some point, I will have the opportunity to open my own marketing company. I am working very hard to achieve that. However, I am finding the journey more difficult than I had originally anticipated.
First of all, the lack of support is getting to me. My husband is awesome, don't get me wrong. But he really dislikes my job. My family and friends are always questioning it. I feel like I am constantly validating my career to everyone. What I do is hard enough without the constant questioning. I wish that the path to ownership was carved out faster, that way I could show them all my accomplishments. Personally, I really feel like I have accomplished a lot already but its not something I can physically show outsiders. I was hoping that a trip to the Bahamas was in my future, but I am not quite ready for that reward. I still have a lot of development ahead of me.
This is the most difficult (paying) job that I have ever had. I worked very hard and have not had tangible things to show for it, as of yet. I have faith that these rewards are in my future, I just wish they were on a time line. That way I could say: "I will own my own business on such and such date." Things do not always work out that way!! For now I will have to deal with the questions.
My life is not out of control and I can definitely manage it. I just have to buckle down and get on it. Life is full of challenges, especially mine at the moment. But my life is equally full of love, laughter, and accomplishment. For now, I will keep the faith!!!

When did I get so old?

I am a ripe old age of 29? That doesn't even sound right. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that 29 was old. I mean its older than 21 or 28 but OLD wasn't supposed to come to me until I was 30. ( Just a little to joke to all of my 30+ year old friends. =)) I just never believed that I would be the oldest person in the room. I know that I can't always be in my 20's and I have come to terms with that. I know it sounds petty; but I just wanted to retain the number in order to keep my youth. But I have come to realize that it has nothing to do with numbers but a youthful spirit.
Having come to terms with my numbers climbing, I started to notice the true differences in my attitude verses those who are just a few years my junior. For example, I am the oldest person at my job. I think I only got to the third interview because of my youthful spirit because I really am at least 3 years older than everyone else. I didn't think it was such a big deal because 3 years is nothing. I have come to realize that those three years are more like 10 for me. I won't go into details, but truly three years makes a difference.
I am not saying anything bad about them, it is just that their motivations and attitudes are so different than mine.
Following are the reasons I believe that I am so much older at the ripe age of 29.
1. I love to work. I think that working hard and working well are reasons to feel proud of myself. I am not sure that this mentality is always shared amongst those in their early 20's. I remember working simply to make money. I also recall doing the bare minimum simply to avoid getting into trouble. I loved to have the cash to buy new clothes, cigarettes, and go out partying. Now I think more about breaking even with childcare, and building my resume through hard work and determination.
2. I like to follow the rules. In the past few years, I began to realize that often rules are there for a reason. Following the rules not only can keep you out of trouble, but it can make you successful. Making sure that I am on time, in uniform, and that I am prepared are all very important to me. Is this a sign of maturity? I think, but I also that that when those in their early 20's don't do those things, it isn't in-maturity. It is more likely forgetfulness or simply a plan to undermine authority.
3.I make sure that I am well rested. I have noticed that those in their 20's or even their 30's stay up too late. I don't judge, I just don't know how they do it. My hubby is really bad about this, he won't go to bed until midnight and then get up at 7 ish. Then he's tired. Why not go to bed? I get tired, I go to bed. Now occasionally I do stay up, but if I have somewhere to be the next morning; I stay up with the full knowledge that I am going to be exhausted the next day. But why stay up just to watch TV, goof around on the Internet, or play video games? I guess to me the cons far outweigh the pros of that scenario.
4.I am married. I really think this ages a person. I didn't realize how unusual it is to be married in my 20's until I got out into the real world. I wouldn't have noticed before, because 99% of my friends are married. Soon to be 100% in the summer because Becky found her Ryan. So in the organization that I work, I am the only one married. It seems weird only because I have been married for 8 years already. Maybe I am weird. I was lucky to find my soul mate at 15 and needed to marry only because I wanted to. This kind of commitment is a huge burst in maturity and therefore age. I have promised, at the ripe old age of 29, to continue to be committed to my husband for the REST of my life, and I am glad to do it. I think that the commitment does age you but so does having concern about another person. So much so that you have to defer to them sometimes, consider them in your decision making, and make sure that you are there for them both physically and emotionally. All things that I would have lacked in my 20's had I not been married.
5. Kids. Need I say more. I feel 10 years older every day. I may already be over 100.

I love the people I work with. Being in this organization will keep me young spirited. I just never realized that I would be the old one, I had it in my head that I would always be the youngest in any given group. For now, I will have to deal with just being eternally and infinitely younger than my nearly 31 year old husband. =) Love ya babe!

Guide to Spending All the Money

Ok. So recently I have decided, although unconsciously, to spend all of our hard earned money. Really, I wanted to rebuild our savings account as it was drained over a year ago in order to purchase my van and to put a down payment on my hubby's new vehicle. But since then it seems as though my goal is to spend money instead of saving it. Therefore, in order to hopefully break this terrible habit, I have decided to write a guide to spending all of the money that your hubby earns.

1. Go on a Disney Vacation during a recession. Although I planned the vacation in advance, I didn't not plan for a severe down turn in the economy. I did not plan for milk to cost $3.00 a gallon and gas to cost $4. I really should have foreseen this when I booked the airline tickets nearly 7 months before we went on our trip. Because of the rise in cost for the most basic of necessities, our savings account did not get replenished, it just got beaten down.

2. Buying fresh fruit, vegetables, soy milk and diapers. Unfortunately, I cannot live without diapers or the soy milk for Miss Chloe. Fresh fruits and vegetables somehow we can live without. It really stinks when purchasing these items can double your grocery bill to nearly double. This inflated grocery bill, once again put savings on hold.

3. Loose a bunch of weight. Yeah, you would think that weight loss would be a blessing. However, loosing weigh costs a lot of money as well. Not only is there the gym membership and healthier food, but you need new clothing. The possibility of saving shrank with both my hubby's and mine waistline. Did you realize that your feet can actually get smaller? I needed new shoes!

4. Give birth to Amazonian Children. My kids are tall and thin. (I have no idea really where this came from.) They are growing extremely fast, and therefore, are constantly in need of clothing and shoes. How is it fair that there is only a little lambs sale twice a year? I need clothes for them constantly! With their growth spurts also came spurts of spending money.

5. Go back to school. Now this is a given. School is expensive, however, there is no need for it to cost hundreds of dollars for a book or even thousands for a credit hour. I needed to go to Walsh. Why? Because they had an accelerated program that I thought might be better given my crazy schedule. Between books, supplies, and a laptop- savings had to take a hit.

6. Allow your children to go to preschool. I am not kidding. Is there a reason that public preschool is so far and in between? I pay a lot of money for my son to attend preschool. Chloe is very nearly potty-trained and my bill will go up by 40%. However, there is no foreseeable end to tuition for tots, our kindergarten charges $200 or more a month for your child to attend full-time. With our taxes, I am surprised at this. However, another way to spend money.....EDUCATION.

7. Get a job. Yea. This should be the opposite of spending money, earning it. However, for a housewife to get a job is a totally different matter. I had to buy clothing, get my haircut (really not optional, it had been 6 months.), get shoes, and any number of other necessities that normal people have. I couldn't take a traditional, 9 to 5 job with regular pay. No way, that may actually cause us to rebuild our savings. I took a job that pays somewhat based on commission with a fail safe pay, but really it's not much. It also calls for travel. So there goes gas money and there goes the point in getting a job.

8. Get into car accidents in your own driveway! Oh, yes, I did. I ran right into a truck in my own driveway. I took out the side view mirror on my 2006 Hyundai. Of course it had to be the nice car. Of course it had to be a truck belonging to a friend. I had to file a claim to be sure that our insurance would take care of our friends costs. I am not pleased with myself. However, there will now be even less in our savings account and a bigger insurance bill next year.

9. Have your appliances break. I know everyone is sick of hearing about my dishwasher. But I am spoiled and I NEED my dishwasher. There goes more money, right down the dishwasher drain. BTW my fridge is making a lot of noise and the lining of my microwave is chipping away! I can't wait for those to break!!!!

10. Get Cats. They are really expensive animals, I didn't realize. So much for avoiding $100+ vet bills.

11. Run the heat, turn on lights, wash anything. Wow utilities went up this year. I am truly considering thermal underwear, candles and a rock to beat our clothing on. I just had a 200+ electric bill. I have no idea why, all I know is that it was a lot of money.

12. Not knowing a plumber. We have a small leak that will end up costing us large amounts of money. I wish I knew a plumber, it really is just a small repair in a tight spot.

Well hopefully, savings will get better. However, I have a feeling that most of these money leeches will be around to stay. I am not bitching, I am just pointing out the best ways to spend all the money without wanting to. I am sure that everyone has their own money leeches and they are free to make a list too. This way, all the world can know how best to unconsciously spend.